I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
