Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
