We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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