whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
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