why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
