How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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