your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
