Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize