1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
