the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
This is my gift to your gina
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
The power of my boobs compel you
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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