Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Even my vagina gasped.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
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