Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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