You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
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