So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
