lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
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