let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
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