Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
