I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Randomize
