Got a toothbrush?
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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