so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize