The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Two words: blizzard sex
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
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