R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
If I had your ass I would rule the world
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
