Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
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