Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Randomize
