Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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