You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
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