Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
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