that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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