Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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