I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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