yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
Slut skills are useful in every country.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize