Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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