He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
fuck your aforementioned shoe
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Randomize
