No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize