I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Randomize
