she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
