if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
