i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
