That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
