i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
