garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
