McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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