he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
