I love black thongs
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Randomize