I wanna bring you to show and tell
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
