At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Randomize
