She's JV to your varsity
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize