I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
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