I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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