Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
God, you're like boner-b-gone
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
