I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
That accounts for only three of the penises
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Randomize
