that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
